Prefer to Maintain Separate Lives
Avoidants view separation as a form of protection, as they fear potential conflicts, discomfort, or criticism from their social circle if their relationship doesn't work out. They choose to keep aspects of their lives distinct, anticipating potential mishaps. They delay introducing their partners until they believe everything is perfectly aligned in every aspect of their life.
Fear of Judgement
Avoidants may be impacted by their fear of being judged or receiving negative opinions about their partner, leading them to question the relationship. Their tendency to take others' judgments to heart is rooted in a subconscious sense of shame, which can intensify in various scenarios. They tend to place significant importance on others' opinions of their partner and can quickly feel ashamed upon hearing such feedback.
Fear of Someone Questioning their Relationship
Occasionally, the avoidant individual may be attempting to safeguard their relationship by refraining from introducing their partner to friends and family. They possess a subconscious awareness that feedback from those in their inner circle holds significant influence over them, hence they choose to steer clear of potential judgment.
They Like to Keep Their Lives Separate
Avoidants see separation as a safety blanket because they feel like if their relationship fails, they don't want any conflict, uncomfortable feelings, or judgment from friends and family. They keep things separate as they often assume something will inevitably go wrong. They won't introduce their partners until things are 100% lined up in all areas of life.
Big Fears of Judgement
Avoidants' fear of judgment or any negative opinion about their partner can affect them and make them doubt or question a relationship. They take people's judgment to heart because they experience subconscious shame, which can magnify in many situations. They can take someone's opinion of their partner very seriously and can easily feel shame hearing their opinion.
Fear of Someone Questioning their Relationship
Sometimes, the avoidant is actually trying to protect their relationship by not introducing them to friends and family. They know on a subconscious level that opinions from people close to them affect them so much, so they avoid putting themselves out there for scrutiny.
They See it as a Huge Commitment
Avoidants often think they don't want to introduce someone unless it's "the one". This level of commitment and vulnerability feels like a really big step, so they don't want to do this unless they think the relationship will work out.
Avoidants typically believe they should only introduce someone if they consider them to be "the one". They see this level of commitment and vulnerability as a significant milestone, and therefore, they prefer to wait until they are confident the relationship will be successful.
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